Boundaries with Older Children (ages 15-19)

I’ve just spent some time doing the model around behaviors with kids and need a little clarification on boundaries vs rules. I have done the model with a lot of the behaviors and am trying to be objective about rules created for safety (to include limiting screen time for sleep and also brain development). I am not sure how it works in terms of, “If you do not put your dishes in the dish washer, then I will not ______.” Fill in the blank with?? Not take you to your friend’s house? That feels like a threat. It is hard to differentiate between rules and boundaries! I have worked the model around several issues and can see when my feeling are hurt vs when I need to have a rule because it is what I “want” in terms of values and how I want to bring up my children. Thanks for any insights!!