Fear: Needed or Indulgent?

UM =
C: Son’s behavior. Teen son is not interacting, crying a lot, doesn’t want to do things he used to enjoy.
T: Something is wrong with my son.
F: Fear.
A: I cry, try to allow and process the fear.
R: We don’t function normally as a family. We are focused on this circumstance and stuck in fear.

IM =
C: Son’s behavior
T: I know how to help him.
F: Resourceful.
A: Give him love, support, talk about getting help.
R: Move through the day feeling a litle better.

Questions = do these models seem right? In the UM, is my fear indulgemt or do I need to allow? It does not produce a result that serves me in the UM as I’ve written it. But I see the fear may be needed to bring the resolve to move into the IM.