Overdrinking program success –and shame

Hi Brooke- Here’s a good news/bad news question. Good News: I feel confident I can succeed to really cutting down and/or eliminating alcohol with your program. Bad News: When I get real about the issues which were driving overdrinking for me, then I realize that overdrinking has been an issue for me for 20 years. My kids are 21, 19, 17. I feel shame and disappointment in myself (as a parent) that I have modeled this coping behavior for them and now two of the three of them are out of the house, basically. We know that kids learn these sorts of unhealthy habits by observing parents. None of my kids are currently big drinkers or partiers. I feel like I could see it, recognize it and help if they did start to have a problem. I care tho about what they think of me and I feel a lot of deep shame over how I’ve shown up in their life over the last 20 years with this issue. How can I get past this feeling? I just see a “circumstance ” and a “feeling” C= the history and I can’t change that; F/feeling= embarrassment, shame . I don’t get how there’s a T or Thought that’s going to change the fact of what I’ve modeled. You’d think I would feel so dang proud of myself for making good strides with this program and instead the less I drink the harder I am on myself about my past habits. I’m basically feeling one big shitstorm over the whole thing. (But I’m not turning to a drink so that’s a good thing. 🙂 lol)