I finally felt joy and better energy for first time since May and then I was kinda needy, lonely. This is where I should have went inward so I understand where I can do it different next time.

But what I did was try to connect with someone. I got triggered by them and went into spiral, got mad, couldn’t control it, they withheld affection, I got more mad, and then they tried to connect and I couldn’t.

Triggered is a C
I felt not good enough I guess.
I felt fear they wouldn’t love me or would act like it but would be doing other things.

I’m not sure how to untangle this.