To feel or to remodel negative feelings?

Hi Brooke, I’m confused about whether I’m supposed to sit in negative feelings to properly feel them instead of buffering OR write a new model with thoughts that better serve me. For example, instead of drinking to mask grief, should I just be kinder to myself during the grieving period and allow grief to be there (i.e. FEEL my feelings)? Or should I go the “model” route and model another thought that doesn’t result in the feeling of grief? This feels like a fork in the road of true recovery/freedom and I’m never sure which road to take (this internal conflict of which road to choose comes up a lot)! Thnak you!