Travel and feeling my feelings

I just came home from a 5 day work trip. I dilligently did my SCS work each day.
But I over drank at night (2 drinks, down from 3)

I am trying to arrange my life so that I don’t have to travel but I am conflicted and clearly eating and drinking my feelings.

I like the solitude I get from traveling
I love the thrill of solving thorny client problems
I like meeting people and talking about the world of work I am in

I hate leaving home and my hubs and kiddos
I need the $$$ travel earns until my online membership scales

These are all thoughts. But i get so driven to just move through travel, i have trouble being intentional in the middle of it.

I have trouble doing clear models while traveling because there are so many feelings. Help!