View of myself as a mother

I am a mom to three kids, ages 17, 15, and 12. They are teenagers and have a general attitude that I am out of touch, embarrassing, etc. I know that is normal teenage behavior, but I still take it very personally and feel hurt. I realize I am creating more pain for myself by my thoughts.

C: Kids make comments about me
T: I am stupid and embarrassing
F: Shame
A: Withdraw, judge them, judge myself, notice all the ways I can’t keep up with modern trends
R: I don’t like myself.

My husband doesn’t care what they say–it doesn’t affect him. But I feel much more triggered. How can I not care so much what they think?