Where to start on relationship problem

My partner and I got into an argument. I am feeling hurt by things that he said. I would like to work through this by both not blaming him for what was said, and not disempowering myself by playing a victim.

Some things he said were “you need to prove to me that you’re feeling better,” “It’s always something,” “I understand you, it’s all you ever talk about.”

I have a lot of thoughts, some are, “I don’t need to prove myself to you,” “this is me, take it or leave it,” “listening and understanding are 2 different things.” Also basically that it’s not okay for me to feel down without him getting upset about it.

I’m really just trying to sort out where this is my work and where to draw a boundary on how I allow him to speak to me. I don’t want to feel like it’s okay for him to say whatever he wants to me and I just do thought work on it and not care anymore. I’m not sure if I’m describing this accurately but am just looking for some direction on where to focus and how to start working towards repairing this which is ultimately what I would like to do.

Thank you!