C – Last Friday, a friend I am coaching sent me links to two other online coaches, one is her friend. She asked me what my coaching is compared to the online coaches she sent me
T – I am not doing a good job
F – Incompetent
A – Ruminating about why my friend would be comparing our coaching to headlines of other coaches; I have not inquired why she did this – waiting for our next coaching session; not self-coached on it until now; I’m judging her; questioning my coaching ability – am I moving too fast?; denying my growth and progress over the last 4 months and allowing comparison to women who have been coaching for a couple of years; judge myself for not accepting where I am right now
R: I am not doing a good job believing in myself
I’m attempting to move to the Intentional Model, but so not ready to – I’m wallowing in victim mode for a little bit. This is also a sore subject because of the thought ‘She is comparing me to others and she’s not even paying me!’, which is more likely the real reason I can’t let this go, I’m so pissed!
T: She’s comparing me to others and she’s not even paying me
A: Responded to her question, but have not spoken to her since; judging her; judging myself for judging her; questioning if I should continue with her or quit on her; ruminate.
R: I’m judging myself for free!
What would be a better serving thought?
T: This is a great model to coach her on
A: Detach myself from her results; explore her reasons for looking at other coaches; coach to show her her mind, with neutrality
R: I coach with the model
I would really appreciate help with getting me through to the intentional model. I absolutely believe in the model; it is my special coaching power! It is the thought, the judgment, that I need to process.