Being stupid

Hi Brooke – I know I am a diamond, and I laugh, because I expect so much more from myself. But just today I have been very punchy. This morning after someone broke something, I said, “he’s so stupid.” and I hardly ever say that, let alone out lout. Then now, someone sent me a stupid email, I said, “he’s so stupid.” I am laughing at myself because – that’s twice – today!

So let me tell you my story. I am finishing the certification, my video was approved, audios turned in, I finish my peer coaching Monday. Then I wait until August 30th to be certified. I have 3 major work/life events next week. Typically I stress out and filled with anxiety and usually my stomach would be turning. But right now, I’m fine, I did over eat just now for lunch, so there is some buffering happening. I feel like my mind is trying to get away with behaving badly, but my actions lead me to believe that I have some cleaning up to do… It’s really weird, like when you watch a toddler that is watching you when they are trying to get away with something.

Am I in the twilight zone?