Buying a new place + fear of hidden flaws

Hi Brooke!

My husband and I just had our offer accepted on a new home. It is our dream home in many ways, and we are investing a lot of money in it — more money than I ever thought we would be able to spend on a home, but we are able to at this stage.

It’s in an old building and we are in the discovery process where we are checking the history and structure of the place, trying to uncover any red flag/issue that would make this a bad deal we should walk away from.

My overarching fear is that we buy the place thinking it’s our dream home, only to realize after a while that there is some terrible hidden flaw that will cost a lot of money to fix, or cause serious inconvenience, or devalue our investment.

I am trying to coach myself through it, but I’m not sure what direction to go in.
None of the topics I’ve coached myself on in the past had 7 figures at stake. 😅

Should I just allow the fear and anxiety as a normal part of buying a home, while at the same time taking the appropriate actions to get expert opinions? The truth is, nobody can guarantee us that everything will be okay, as some things are just uncertain or unpredictable.

My two conflicting models are:

C Offer on new home
T This could be amazing
F Joy, excitement, gratitude
A Visualize, plan renovations, daydream
R New home is amazing in my head

C Offer on new home
T This could be a terrible mistake
F Fear, doubt, anxiety
A Discuss/imagine/worry over possible bad scenarios with husband, plan for experts to come in and check out the place
R ?

What I want is for this home to be as great as it seems, and not have any problems down the line. 🙂

I have wondered if it was just a matter of deciding this was our dream home no matter what, but then it feels like I might overlook or disregard some key element pointing in the other direction.

I would welcome your guidance! Thank you!