Committing to a purpose I feel unsure about


Dear Brooke, both in 2017 and 2018 I have freaked out during August. Both years I wrote my purpose then, despite listening to all your advice to simply choose and move forward, I’ve worried it over to the point I can’t sleep, have headaches and feel a lot of anxiety. In 2017 I completed the workbook on the purpose “I want to live a romantic life”. Although I did all the homework it didn’t stick or impact my actions during the year. I began August 2018 thinking a purpose that focussed more on contribution would be more compelling, such as:
My purpose is compassionate action in the world.
My purpose is to foster kindness.
My purpose is to model wisdom and integrity.
…but when I did models on these I felt like they were generating feelings of tiredness or a victimy feeling.

The purpose I landed on was “to live a daring life”. This feels exciting and asks me to go bigger. It’s more or an approach to life or way of being than an end-goal – is that ok?

My concern is, am I avoiding a meaningful altruistic purpose like compassionate action because it feels hard?

Also, do you have any suggestions for how I can ensure my purpose comes alive beyond August?

In 2017 I generated lots of ideas but I think I was so uncertain that I never felt truly committed to my purpose.I know you cannot pick my purpose for me but any guidance you have that would help it stick this year is deeply appreciated – I’m driving myself cray cray! Thank you.