I have been in contact with an estranged sister in law on my husbands side of the family. Husband doesn’t want anything to do with her but initially said he was fine if I chose to be in contact. So I’ve developed a relationship with her again and we have been talking back and forth about my pregnancy and upcoming baby. The day before I deliver my baby my husband tells me he doesn’t want me texting her especially anything about the baby. I feel myself so conflicted. I want to respect him and his reasons behind not wanting to involve her in our and our kids lives, but I feel terrible suddenly stopping communication and having to tell her I can’t tell her about or send her pictures of our baby. I’m scared feeling like I will ruin whatever relationship was started but also don’t want to ruin an even more important relationship with my husband. Trying to figure out which part of the scenario to put in a model. These are all my thoughts about
C husband said he doesn’t want me texting her
T-this will ruin my relationship with her but I want to respect husband
F: conflicted
A: spinning in my head about what to do with no action taken to contact sil
R: ruined relationship with SIL while respecting husband

Do we sometimes just have negative feelings and produce 50/50 results?
I want my result to be great relationship with SIL and husband. I don’t know how to do that without being in contact with her.