Getting Past Lifelong Limiting Beliefs While Dealing With Health Issues


So, I’ve been trying to figure out how to ask this question in some sort of concise way for quite a while, but for whatever reason, I feel the need to give you some personal background just because it seems relevant to me to the questions I have. It might not be. Sorry, but I think it’s going to be rambly mess and have a lot of my negative thoughts mixed in.

Anyway, from the time I was very young I suffered from physical discomfort and fatigue and I was a very anxious child. I had nightmares that traumatized me for years (my nightmares included things like my parents trying to kill me with axes and chainsaws at around 6 years old. I was a very sheltered kid and we only had network TV. There was no violence or even really arguing in my family up to that point). I know I always had sleep problems and was in and out of the ER with asthma attacks and had pneumonia before I was a year old and then when I was 4.

Up until I was 9 my family was fairly typical. My parents seemed to get along and they always had jobs and food on the table. My grandma was my only babysitter. Life was pretty consistent and I had no real external problems to speak of in my life.

When I was about 11 my parents started going to a church that I now refer to as a “cult”. I don’t know if it meets the technical definition of a cult, but our lives started to change dramatically. My mother became very anxious and stressed and had mood swings and sometimes became very abusive. My mother eventually told my dad she wanted a divorce and he moved out. Long story short my mom married the “cult” leader. We weren’t allowed to fraternize with family or go to family functions. My mom got to the point that she was very crazy. My step father was very controlling.

My anxiety issues spiraled out of control. I developed what I am sure would have been diagnosable tricotilomania and body dysmorphic disorder.

I guess you can imagine how many issues I had to deal with as a teen and young adult.

I have been diagnosed with fibromyalgia / chronic fatigue, generalized anxiety disorder, major depressive disorder and other things as an adult. I used to be on a lot of medication, but I haven’t taken any Rx medication in about 10 years. I have just steadily been working on fixing my thinking and emotions.

I gave that background just to give perspective to my questions. Most of the things I have described have been shown to have a positive correlation with fibromyalgia / chronic fatigue in research. I know a psychiatrist once told me that childhood sleep disorders and childhood abuse abuse does. A rheumatologist once told me that tension / anxiety has a link to fibromyalgia whereas depression does not.

Rambly intro to question 1:
I have wanted to be a life coach since i was in my early 30s. Before that I wanted to be a LPC or Therapist of some kind. I did Get a BA in Human Service / Psych in my early 20s. I haven’t worked a full time job of my own in my adult life due to the health issues that I have had, but I do know that I have the ability to understand emotional and thinking issues clearly and help people with them. It’s just what I always do and have always done. I take what I learn and teach it to other people if they seem like they might benefit and if they seem like they might want to hear it.

Question 1:
I am having a difficult time figuring out how to wrap my head around everything that I would have to do as a Life Coach and how I could do all of that without letting it be stressful. I feel overwhelmed sometimes and stop moving forward. It feels to me like I need some more specific advice than “don’t let it be stressful / overwhelming”. Anything more specific you could share?

Rambly intro to next question:
I’ve been told by parents, doctors, teachers, etc that my issues are all in my head all of my life. I understand that is a common thing with fibromyalgia. But I’m a bright enough person to be able to figure out when I have physical pain (for no apparent reason) it IS actually real and painful (even though there is no apparent cause).

Question 2:
Should I put any effort into trying to figure out where my self limiting BELIEFS / emotions end and where any real limitations that I might have that might be seperate from the beliefs begin so that I can try to structure my life and work related activities around that?

Thanks for all you do. I love you and your work. Sorry so long and rambly.