How can I help when I often feel the same way?

Hi! I have started to notice a pattern in my thinking. I want to help others move past their pain while raising their own family and care giving for a parent. However, I understand first hand how care giving and raising a family is very challenging and can be painful. I feel blocked when people say ” I am overwhelmed with all I have to do for my mother and family” or “It is painful to watch my mother loose her memories, abilities and independence”. I wonder if they want to be helped or if they just want to feel bad? I agree with them that it is hard, overwhelming and difficult. How can I help someone feel better about all that comes with care giving when often times I feel the same way? Maybe it is to just let them know that feeling bad is OK but if they allow those feelings to turn into resentment, become a victim and dread care giving that is where the help comes in?