JOMO (Joy Of Missing Out)

Over the past few years I am really owning how much of an introvert I am; thankfully I married an introvert who makes no apologies for being one. My energy is filled up when I’m solitary and depleted when I’m around people. I have worked to really accept this, honor my preferences and say “No” when it serves me instead of “Yes” when it doesn’t feel authentic.

It feels SO good to finally feel in alignment and to stop the habit of people-pleasing or judging myself for my preferences.

My question is when there are certain obligations that I feel torn about saying “yes” to because I would rather say “no” like a family obligation. There’s a bridal shower coming up and I’d love to say no but I guess I’m struggling with feeling guilty or selfish. On the one hand my thought is “Stop making such a big deal out of this and just go” and on the other hand my thought is “If you go out of obligation you’ll have to really put on a performance that you want to be there”.

I’ve worked on accepting my JOMO but there are still some vestiges of not wanting to insult people who invite me to things or not wanting to appear to be “difficult”.

I was considering that I should work on a compelling reason that will make it easier to be neutral about going rather than negative about going.

Is this the best way to approach this? I know Brooke has JOMO and has said she will say yes to certain gatherings because her husband enjoys it and she enjoys seeing him enjoy it.

Where do you draw the line and release the struggle with family obligations and JOMO?