I need some help with the model below. I’m feeling a lot of dread and sadness as my maternity leave is coming to an end in 2 weeks and I’m going back to work. I own my own business and choose to be a working mom. But, I’m ruminating in thoughts like my baby is “too little” and “I’m going back to work too soon” and the biggest one – “I’m going to miss out on this time with her” even though I’m fully aware it is my CHOICE to go back to work. I’m even ruminating in thoughts about delaying when she starts daycare or somehow adjusting my schedule to go back to work. I’m making it way more confusing that it has to be and also feeling a lot of guilt around it.
I see that I don’t have my own back here at all!
C Daughter starts full time daycare in 2 weeks
T I’m going to miss this precious time with her and I can’t get it back
A ruminate in thoughts of dread and consider changing plans
IM. – I don’t even know how to fill this out because I’m not even sure how I WANT to feel here. I’ve thought about choosing confidence in my decision as a feeling, but it’s not quite it.