My Indulgent Emotion of Resentment is a Manual and a Mirror: I’m looking for a better thought also a way to change my T “she resents me” because I suspect its a belief i.e. I’m actually considering it a C.

Hey Brooke,

I’ve noticed a nexus of indulgent emotions in my thought work. My indulgence in Worry leads to the action of People Pleasing and my indulgence in Overwhelm leads to buffering and/or a spiral of Self-Pity Indulgence which leads to Resentment. YAY! :

I’ve become aware that I indulge in resentment towards my mother and sister, disguised as the mirror T of “they resent me”.

Also realized that although I’ve identified it as a T, I believe it is a C. The indulgence in Resentment also leads to Self-Pity actions.

I’m wondering if Resentment is really just based on a Manual I have for them and that they “shouldn’t” resent me. I mirror the Resentment back and “I resent them for resenting me” and “I resent myself for people-pleasing them” and taking inauthentic actions to control how they feel about me. Sigh.

In moments of clarity, I watch myself and can interrupt my pattern thought errors and spirals, I’ve identified the soup of Overwhelm, Self-Pity, Resentment all meshed up. Taking a look at it as the Watcher and doing this work has allowed me to parse out the pattern and how the emotions lead to each other in real time.

I’m wondering if I consider experimenting with “they resent me” as a C and work to release caring about it, making it mean they shouldn’t, or “they should love me”, which quickly spirals to people-pleasing OR experiment with changing the belief that they resent me. “They resent me and that’s okay” or “They resent me is a thought.” ?

Here’s a model:

C- Mother said “I didn’t get to go to college like you did, you think you’re so great cos you have this degree.”
T- She resents me.
F- Betrayal
A- Withdraw from her
R- Disconnection; I resent her for faking happiness and resenting me.

Thanks Brooke 💕