Perfectionism and Discipline


I have been a perfectionist all my life and it’s something I have been getting away from in recent years because I associate it with high stress and I know it leads to unnecessary suffering. At the same time though, I have a belief that my past perfectionism led to positive results and now that I’m allowing myself to be not be perfect, I am not getting as many positive results as I used to. A recent example that my mind is using as evidence:

Circumstance: Ate non-protocol foods, got a skin rash (I wont say that the foods caused the rash because I dont know if that’s a fact)

My thought was: “This happened because i went off my food protocol. I hate that i have to be so strict and there’s no room for error”

The belief is that, not only am I not getting my desired result because I’m not doing things perfectly, but I’m also experiencing negative consequences.

Rash = consequence of not being strict enough/disciplined enough/perfect

I know that my previous positive results weren’t from me being “perfect”, but rather from the focus, disciplined actions, etc. Problem is I see these as characteristics of perfectionism so I think I am subconsciously rejecting them because I see them as red flags.

I need help disassociating discipline with perfectionism so that I don’t see it as something negative and therefore not allow myself to feel/be disciplined and create the results I want.