Self-acceptance, self-tenderness, self-love… (Nadège)

Hi Brooke,
I was online for tonight’s Diamond Coaching Call and didn’t dare raise my hand but Elizabeth and Whitney helped a lot – thanks, ladies! Just like them, I’m dealing with terrible (!) self-judgment. I want to really accept where I am right now – all the progress I’ve made and everything I still have to learn.
I intellectually get that I need first to:
1. accept
2. feel
3. modify if needs be.
But at the same time, I’m arguing with myself and a very harsh voice in my head absolutely refuses that I should “let myself go” with all I’m doing wrong.
First question: should I actually try to understand why I judge myself so harshly?
You said that beating ourselves up is never necessary or useful. I get that and I agree. I also know that feeling an emotion is not that hard because I’m training myself to feel on purpose whatever I’m feeling 5 minutes a day. I’m getting better at it, even if today I only see the negative .
Second question: after feeling my harsh self-judgment, how could I feel self-tenderness and self-love as you suggested? Here’s what I’m thinking of:
– I’m always doing my best.
– I’m learning how to take care of myself.
Thank you so much!
Nadège (midnight in Paris!)