Dear Brooke,

Here’s my dark question for you 😉

Each time I read or hear about acute suffering it reinforces an unintentional model I have that looks something like this:
C: Famine/Illness/Murder/Tsunami/Abuse etc
T: Life includes suffering that can be close to intolerable and there is an element of chance to it (not controllable)
F: Vulnerable. Afraid.
A: Save money. Donate money. Look after health. Careful. Risk-averse.
R: Alleviates anxiety somewhat but continue to feel vulnerable. Stay safe until unpredictable happens. Decisions made from fear. Live a smaller life.

This “T’ feels very true. I can see that in some ways it helps me to keep me safe but it also puts me (and all humans) in a victim position since there’s so much we can’t control. Can you help me with alternative thoughts? I have:
“There is suffering – and I can help”
“I can face any amount of suffering with dignity and courage”
“Humans are built to endure”
– these thoughts are all helpful to me, but the fear still feels stronger. The fact that some people endure so much undermines my ability to believe that life is fundamentally benevolent and things happen for us.