this weekend

i noticed this weekend that i tried to control my bf.
i held a motiational speech in which i was aggresivly saying that he should care for his relationships meaning friends and family.
I didn’t likethe way a did it and the reason i did it neither.

the truth is that if he were to be one of those people who have no friends. I would think of him less.. i would think he is boring and yea. So i try to prevent it.. and I can get really mean.
i said things like “do you want to end up like your dad with no friends?”

i don’t like being that way but i’m also scared that he will not have a life. And I will.

how can i just love him no matter what he does. and i want to give him advice from a loving place. With the reason that i want him to feel good and not because i want to feel good. I don’t want to have an egoistic reason.

can you help me with that?
so next time i can just let it be.


i’m a diamond now. soo fun!!!