2.14.18 Question on Self-Pity

Hi Brooke,

I didn’t realize how much self-pity I have until I listened to your podcast!

In writing my thoughts this morning, I’ve realized that my self-pity revolves around disappointment and resentment in others (mainly my mother and my husband) not giving me what I have believe(d) that I deserve. I now know the issue is MY thoughts and not them.

Here’s an example:
My mother – I have a twin sister, and over the past 20 years has regularly helped her and her kids out more than she has me and my kids (buying them things that she won’t buy me, watching her kids when she won’t watch mine). My sister lives in Israel and does not earn what I do, so my mom has told me that she does feel the need to help her more. My mind tells me this is not fair, but I know these are my thoughts about the situation. I then think “I am thankful that I have a good job, great family and don’t need her help”. I just wish she would want to at least offer me the same (my thoughts of self pity!)

My questions are:
– Do I need to completely get rid of wanting any praise or help from others?
– Should I depend only on myself to feel special, loved, appreciated?
– Is there anything wrong with me wanting my husband to regularly tell me I’m beautiful?