Hi Coaches,
This may seem super trivial but I can’t quite get through it and it’s affecting how I show up with my partner.
I’m finding it hard to accept compliments from my boyfriend. He tells me I’m the most beautiful woman he’s ever seen and been with. He tells me I am hot and smart. He couldn’t think of a better woman to be with. He loves me more than anything– ever in his life. He always looks me in the eye when he says it and is so sincere.
Amazing, right? I know I should be basking in all of this and I can’t. I find it so hard to accept what he says as truth. Right now, every time he says it, I get annoyed. I want him to stop saying it because I believe it’s not true. I think, “Yeah right, there are so many women out there who are so much more beautiful, hot and smarter than me.”. I show up in a different way, I get dismissive.
UM
C: Partner says, “You are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen.”
T: Goodness, we both know that is not true. Just stop saying it!
F: Irritated
A: I act dismissive and irritated with him. I am short in my response. I want to walk away. I change the subject. I feel more and more uncomfortable. I want him to admit he’s lying (!). I start thinking about my flaws and find fault with every shortcoming, especially my body and weight. As if he can’t see all of that.
R: (not sure about this) I prove to myself that it is not true (?)
IM
This is how I want to feel and those are the actions that would result from that. The truth is, I do feel and act like that when he is attentive and brings me cups of tea and water, when I am working for example, or when he brings me warm socks at night and a blanket when we’re watching TV. I want to feel like this when he says these words and I just can’t seem to come up with a bridge thought.
C: Partner says, “You are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen.”
T: ??
F: Adored and Loved
A: I fall even more in love with him. I ask myself, “How did I get so lucky?”, I appreciate his words and think how wonderful it is that I have finally met the man of my dreams who adores me and loves all of me in all my glory. I couldn’t have asked for a better guy.
R: –
Help… 😉 Pretty please
