Afraid to share myself due to my job!

So around 2006 I started doing Youtube videos around healing, relationships, gardening and over all sharing my life. I did it until about 2011 when I moved to another state. The move was hard on us mentally, physically and definitely emotionally. I moved to a place where the culture was so different from the place I was raised and the place I spent the last 20 years living. Long story short I found myself being mentally and emotionally abused by the people I worked with. Not just by the bosses but by the subordinates as well. Any weakness they found they would use it to their advantage to deflect. This was new to me as I am not a person that is easily shaken. But I’ve never been in a situation where there was so many mind games being played. I went from having a fast track career to management hoping to be a director to being label as stupid and unable to get my work done which I take pride it. I was confused as to how my knowledge could change so drastically from one state to another but the field was the same.

It got to the point where I needed to do something my health went down hill fast and decided to start my own business. Hired 2 coaches and 2 years later. I’m so afraid to go live on social media or share my life with people like I did in 2006-2011 that when ever I attempt to do a video I get a solid heavy knot in my chest and stomach area. It’s making it hard for me to move forward in getting back into doing what I love. I believe I’m afraid to got back to social media because I don’t want anyone from my job to see me and I get fired or they use it against me like they have done in the past.