Am I stuck as a victim?

My ex-boyfriend was a narcissist. He has seriously hurt one of our mutual friends in the past. Another one of our mutual friends wants to join the book club that I run. We read self help books and share personal experiences during our meetings. I told her that as long as she is still associating with him it would not be safe for her or myself if she attended our book club. Now I find myself wondering if I’m still locked up in the victim mentality.