I am in the middle of a court proceeding. I work as a lawyer. I can’t stop thinking about controlling the outcome and I am coming from a place of insecurity, fear and self doubt. I have this constant fear I am not prepared. I can’t come up with a thought for the intentional model. First thought that comes up for intentional model is I want to feel in control. That feels right. Not good.
Here is my unintentional model:
C: Lawyers on the other side make accusations against me and my client about procedural unfairness
T: I hope I know what I am doing
A: Ruminate, spend my time thinking about the interactions and potentially losing this case/telling myself I should be better/ not being clear when speaking
R: I am not showing up like I want