In the past, in several cases, when I’ve had anxiety in a relationship, it turned out that I was being cheated on. In a couple of more recent instances, I would get this steady feeling of anxiety and then a very specific, sudden intuitive urge to check something out. The intuitive urge was so specific that within literally minutes, I found definite, indisputable evidence that they were cheating. In both cases, I broke up with them immediately.
Now, I’m in a new, amazing relationship with a man that makes me feel safe, heard and understood and this feels like the best relationship I’ve ever had. I choose to trust him, most of the time even though this is not easy for me. In my heart of hearts, I feel like he’s not at all like the men from my past and that I can fully trust him. We’re moving in together shortly. Once in a while, not very often, I get anxious. It’s usually if I haven’t heard from him via text that day (silly, I know, the man’s gotta work!). I guess what I’m struggling with is how can I distinguish between “useless” anxiety that I need to work through vs. my intuition telling me something is off?