Beating myself up for buffering


Hi. My circumstances of today are: more tissue on my abs than 1 week ago; decided to indulge in regret, overwhelm, feeling lost since I woke up; did not have a protocol for today and stayed on +2 on the hunger scale eating more that I would have done on a normal day on protocol
T: I should have known so much better on how to deal with these circumstances
F: not good enough
A: beat myself up
R: past focused, not move forward

So I know beating myself up makes no sense, and I was sure I swore to myself I would not do it any more. I also know intellectually that there are no good and bad decisions. I try to tell myself that the decision of beating myself up and act by default was the best decision given the situation I was in this morning. Still, my brain does not believe it. I can be curious about my thoughts, and wrote down plenty of them. But it looks like I can stop beating myself up only if I get to believe 100% that buffering and beating myself up are not bad. Suggestions to move there? Thanks