Being confident versus arrogant or judgmental versus opinions the difference?

I have been working on being confident BUT not that I am insecure and need to gain or develop confidence. What I am talking about is when I am confident about something or doing something and may come off arrogant or judgmental, even though that is not my intent at all and if people think this….it is their manual, of course.

I only recognize this when I am “arrogant” or”judgmental” when I get a feeling of frustration and wanting to continue to give my opinion by adding more comments and in some cases getting louder or change the tone of my voice in a more authoritative manner (which is confidence in my mind) with my voice.

A lot of times, I will just listen to what the other person has to say, respect that, be curious and accepting, but sometimes then I feel like I am a doormat with no connection with the person. Getting responses from people I am talking to, I get the thought “I am not being heard” or “I am not being understood” by them not responding to what I said or asked or they talk about something which is not what we are talking about.

I do not do this from a place of wanting to change people’s opinions or get them to do what I want but that it is important that everyone’s view points are respected and heard and possibly a decision of sorts can be made considering everyone even if my comments are not the one’s chosen.

I love connection with people. It is very frustrating. I feel like I am coming from a very genuine caring place, but somehow responses give me feedback that a person has not respected or heard me.

Life Coach School talks about letting adults do and say what they want because you cannot “change” them. They are going to do what they want.

I want to continue to be aware of this and am looking for advice on the difference between giving one’s opinion and confidence. If you think about it having a conversation is people giving “their thoughts….opinions” on a topic of discussion, sharing information etc. When do opinions or words become judgmental?

Thank you coaches! Appreciate you.