Being nice = being manipulative?

Hi Brooke,

I’ve noticed that in a few coaching session you called out being nice, avoiding conflict or agreeing to something you didn’t really wanted as being manipulative.

When somebody does something not so great of even hurtful to me I often tend to tell people that “it’s okay, and no worries” but I started wondering if I do that to manipulate how they think of me or out of fear to loose them.

Recently had a short and very intense relationship with an old coworker of mine, I started falling for him, but he wasn’t into it the way I was.

I did tons models on “he is not the one, if he doesn’t likes you”, and than tried to see situation from his end and eventually found peace.

In the past few days I was feeling really good about progress I’ve made with the models and I wanted to send a note saying “hey it’s all good, I think you are amazing, doesn’t matters how things ended” but now I wonder if that would be just an attempt to manipulate to him to feel about me a certain way.
What questions do I need to be asking myself to figure out if it really “unconditional” or it’s just last attempt of my mind to get him to comply to my manual?

Thank you!