belief in my value

While working on the belief that money is created by putting value into the world, I find it back-firing and it has me analyzing past circumstances.

I have the thought that the reason I was laid off several times in my career (company re-structures, etc.) is because I did not create enough value for them to keep me. Whatever I did wasn’t good enough. The thought has me feeling debilitated and is influencing my current thoughts about money and my business, such as I don’t have the result (steady income from my coaching business) because my value must not be good enough or worth someone paying me. I have some evidence that it isn’t true because I have several clients and have gotten paid (about 11K so far in 2020 with a goal of 100K which is what I made in my corporate career) and I have other positive (non-money) results.

I feel like I’m in a bit of a spiral. I’m taking action. I send two emails a week to my list of 230+ subscribers, post consistently on social media, engage on posts and with connections, provide free pdfs, videos/webinars and courses. Thoughts about working harder or 10X my effort create the feeling of exhaustion and another thought – what’s the point, it’s not good enough anyway because I worked my ass off in my corporate career but every one of my last 3 corporate jobs ended in me being told directly or indirectly I was not needed.

I’d like help believing the value I’m putting out there is good enough to create money consistently and once and for all leave the past behind me.