Believing vs Grieving

I have been grieving the loss of a three-year relationship. I decided to move to be closer to work. My partner decided it is best to let this relationship go as we live so far apart. I have been working on thought models and feel good about the decision to let the relationship go also. However, this grief has been coming and going as grief does its thing through me.

I would like to get moving on my goals with money and yet my last 20m coaching call focus became to still feel the feelings of grief.

I would like to just believe the thought that I am taking responsibility for the grief and move forward with my goals without buffering or avoiding my feelings. How do I know when I am ready to do that and apply the better feeling thought model? How do I know if I am buffering?