Blackout Drunk

I am working on the stop drinking program and do amazing Monday – Thursday. I don’t drink at all. The urges are stronger at the beginning of the week, but I have it set in my mind that there are zero exceptions and do not drink. I do a thought download and model each day. I allow urges. My goal is 100 urges. I have 18.

The weekend is where it gets messy. I drink from 5 or 6 pm until 10 pm and go to bed. Friday, Saturday, and Sunday. My concern is I don’t remember the going to bed part. I remember the whole night, just not the last hour. This happens all the time for me. It’s not healthy, and I want to change this.

Last weekend I tried a drink plan of 6 drinks on Sat and Sunday. I drank Friday, Saturday and Sunday and lost count each time. I even tried writing it on my arm each time I got a drink to keep track but that didn’t work. After 3 drinks, I just don’t care anymore.

This weekend I did not have a drink plan and drank Friday-Sunday. Same result as last weekend and frankly every weekend before that.

I’m not sure were to even start to fix this. Please give me any advice.

C – Blackout drunk Friday-Sunday
T – That’s not good and this is really unhealthy
F – Worried
A – Drink Friday – Sunday
R – Damage my health, gain weight, create anxiety