Boundaries – speeding


I heard Brooke give an example of a boundary about speeding: “If you speed I will have to get out of the car.”

My question: I have a fear when driving with my husband, especially when our kids are in the car. He speeds and drives in a way that I consider dangerous and requires me doing constant mental work in the moment. Last year we took an RV road trip – super proud of myself for the growth through the thought work I did, whilst now realising after hearing Brooke that I could have set a boundary there.

I feel furthermore concerned around him driving the kids without me present, I’m having trouble imagining setting a boundary with this. I can see how I might set it for myself, maybe even for myself and the kids if I’m present (not sure about this as he’s also obviously their parent, too) but can imagine difficulty setting it for the children if I’m not also in the car.

Interestingly one of the reasons I don’t pursue it is imagining us ending in divorce over it (amongst other things) and then I’d have zero control over his care of the kids when they were in his custody in terms of things such as car safety/speeding etc.

It seems right now that it has to continue to be a question of what I want more for myself and liking my reasons either way. But this is a tough one for me. Would love input on this.