Boundaries, the model and my friend’s dog

Hi Brooke,
Melanie here again.

I boasted about my income goal recently but I am also aware that my fear around boundaries is an obstacle to massive action.

I need seem help with the model.

Here’s an example of my sticking point. My good friend is the type of person who says “what’s yours is mine” and who thinks nothing of bringing her sisters dog over and inviting it into my house without asking.

I am someone who tends towards rules and structure and likes the security and safety of that.


So my friend bought herself a dog 2 weeks ago.

We have free ranging poultry in the yard and I wish for her to keep her dog out of the yard and not invite her in, even though she is chilled around other animals.

I anticipated her bringing the dog over so after a week of worry about it, I finally invited her over but asked her to please not bring the dog as it might scare our animals.

She was a little defensive and said that her dog is perfectly fine. But I reiterated my desire, nicely, and she handled it.

It sounds like nothing but this was a big thing for me to stand up for myself.

However I am stuck with the C, because the circumstance hasn’t happened yet, it is something I anticipated and tried to circumvent.

Is the c my past thought about what might happen? I can’t quite grasp it.


Ps at the end of it all, I think this is about control and respect. As I used to say about my parents inscessant bickering about what we in the dinner, “it’s never about the capsicum”.