Boyfriend is probably cheating


Last night I was having date night with my boyfriend of one year. He was showing me a new cryptocurrency he got into on his laptop and I noticed that he had tabbed “Plenty of Fish,” which is a dating site. I have had my suspicions about him cheating in the past couple months (finding two different types of hair that were not mine in his place.)

I’m upset that he would cheat, but I’m more upset that I don’t say anything. I’m choosing to stay with him because he provides valuable information to me about investing. I know I’d be ok if we broke up, I feel that I could take it from here. So why haven’t I made the move? I’m the one suffering in this relationship. I feel like I haven’t been true to myself the whole time I’ve been with him. Here’s a few models. Please give any advice. I do want to stay with him.

Unintentional Model:

C-Find hair that’s not mine in boyfriend’s apartment
T-he’s cheating on me
F-insecure/ fear
A-buffer with food/indecision
R- suffer

Intentional Model:

C- See boyfriend’s tabbed dating site on computer
T-of course he’s meeting with other women. I’ve been a sucky girlfriend!
F- motivated
A- fuel the fire more
R-rekindle our relationship

To make sense of that thought, I haven’t been my best the past few months with him. I’ve been fighting with him almost every date night. So, if I want to choose to have a relationship with him, I have to make the first adjustments. If he follows, he follows. If not, I can choose to leave happily, knowing I put my best foot forward to make it work.

Thank you so much in advance!