Breaking up with a friend Part 2


Hello Brooke,

So I completed the model this morning and my action was to be honest with my friend and tell her simply that I love her and that I’m not willing to reconnect at this point. She is choosing sadness and confusion, which is fine, of course, but her thought is that she must have hurt me in order for me not to want to reconnect. This is not true. My current thought is that it is my responsibility to correct her thinking and let her know that is not the case, but doing so: 1) feels like me taking responsibility for her thoughts and feelings (which is a pattern of mine), and 2) seems like it re-opens the door for conversation and renegotiating the relationship which I am very clear with myself about not wanting to do.

When you talk about letting people be wrong about me, does this fall into that category? Is it okay to let someone think they have hurt you when they haven’t?

Thank you!

Erica