Buffering


I have been doing a lot of buffering lately and trying to do models on it. This weekend I sat down to read so many times then found something I needed to do or ended up checking social media or messaging a friend. In my head, I want to sit down and read but then I find it so uncomfortable that I have to do something else and I don’t know why.

I don’t really know what line I should start my model in, my major issue is checking my messages on social media, I don’t tend to scroll its just constant checking. Also, this is such an ingrained behavior. I can’t pinpoint what the feeling is, could unconscious be a feeling? I feel a bit annoyed when I do it?

C sit down to read/work
T I should check my messages
F Annoyed
Check messages, procrastinate, put off work, distract
R wasted time and self-judgment

or should I start with it in the c line

C Checking messages
T I need to check my messages quickly
F hurried/ annoyed at self
A Check messages, procrastinate, delay work, judge self
R slow progress in achieving my goals because I’m buffering

I’m doing it now… I should be working.
Its almost as if I find it really uncomfortable to sit still and be [resent with my body and brain