Buffering or just plain lazy?

I am new to scholars this month and so far I’ve been following the homework plan and listening to all the shows. However, the more i work on me the more I realise how much I am buffering and I think sometimes listening to the podcasts and doing the homework seems like a form of buffering. Is that possible? It sometimes just feels like I’m procrastinating and not acting on the work I have done. Then when I analyse why I’m buffering the only answer I get is that I’m simply being lazy. Can that be enough of an answer for buffering? Rather than a deeper issue? And if so, then I get upset that I’m being “lazy” and can’t seem to snap out of it even when I then do the model of being lazy as I can’t seem to find a reason for it, it just seems like sometimes I just can’t be bothered. Then I hate that about myself!! Any advice? Thanks!