^buffering not on autopilot

Hi Brooke
One question on buffering. I understand all the concepts about the brain and learning new things..etc but when I buffer, I don’t feel like I’m on autopilot. I’m excruciatingly aware that I should not be buffering, that I will pay later, that I can choose not to …etc But the desire is large, so I go ahead anyway, recognising the self-sabotage in that.
I know my goal – I want to be able to handle all my emotions – but I’m not necessarily utilising the tools effectively (or at all) to allow every urge.
Is it normal for people to have a number of runs at stopping buffering? If I fail, just start again tomorrow?