I have been working on stopping bingeing for a few years. I have felt like giving up and quitting. I have gained awareness of many of my thoughts but I don’t think I have been able to change as I always still do the same thing. That is what I tell myself.
Sometimes I have not over-eaten and binged, but I feel like I’m getting more annoyed and frustrated with the process and I have stopped believing in myself. I’m reinforcing my thoughts and finding more evidence for the thoughts that I have that don’t serve me. Some of those thoughts are:
I will always be this way.
I haven’t changed.
I’m messed up.
I’m stuck this way.
Each time I reflect on what is happening I tend to be annoyed that I see the same thing happening. Then I start working on that. Then one of my other patterns will happen and I start to think that I can’t do this. There’s just too much going on for me to make any progress and think of all of it as a problem that I can’t deal with anymore. I’m fed up dealing with it as I’m just going around in circles and I can’t handle it anymore.
I’m not sure what to do next. I start looping in my self judgment when I try to work on my thoughts and get intentional about seeing what results I create by choosing those thoughts. I start judging the thoughts I had when I did the work. I know doing this work helps and worked in the past for me. But right now, all I see is problems and no progress being made