Buffering with sweets, alcohol, and stalking!

Hi! I am working on quitting buffering and feeling more!

However, I have not managed to do it entirely yet (though it has reduced).  At some point, I notice myself buffering and so I get more anxious because I know that I’m buffering and I can’t stop. And then I feel bad because I have buffered and I feel that it will never change. I am more self aware but it looks like I still refuse to entirely feel. How can I get out of this circle when I am aware that I am buffering? Beating myself up does not help, right ?

Thank you so much for your help !!!