Can you buffer with new thoughts?

Dear Coaches,
One of the things I’m finding when I self coach is that I move on from my emotions very quickly by pointing out things like – that’s coming from a thought, I’m no longer believing that thought – I’m working on this thought, etc. An example is – I had an employee leave abruptly with no notice and left behind several unfinished projects. Each time I find something else that wasn’t finished, I feel angry, which is coming from thoughts like – she shouldn’t have left this mess for me to deal with. And rather than actually feel the anger – I think – oh, wait. Yes, she should have left this mess because she did. And I feel the anger dissipate, I feel some peace with the reality of the situation, and I move on with the task at hand. On one hand, it feels much more calm and peaceful in my mind when I do this. But at the same time, I wonder if I have really processed the anger or if I’m buffering the emotion with self-coaching and switching to a new thought so quickly. I guess the question is how do I know when I should start working on the new thought vs. letting myself stick with the old thought/feeling until I’ve processed it.

Thank so much!