can’t bring myself to visualize

I used to love visualizing. I used a process by Abraham called: scripting and it’s long been a profound source of joy just imagining scenarios of what I wanted and seeing them come about on paper.

For some reason I can’t bring myself to do that lately. And it’s never been more important. I’m leveling up in my life big time, and actually healing my body (from “chronic” illness). My body is in the process of coming on board, so there’s physically a lot of discomfort.

In supporting my mind and body in this process I want to prioritize scripting, but the self-sabotage is so strong it’s kind of ridiculous. I watch Scholars instead, or I take a bath to soothe my body, AND when I do sit down for it, it’s not nearly as effective as it used to. My mind tends to steer me straight into fears I’ve had, doubts I’ve had and then instead of visualizing I find myself back doing the same work on my brain.

How can I solve this? I know grinding it out and trying to overcome the resistance is just more resistance. I’m getting pissed at my brain for doing this, and that’s more resistance too. I understand my brain is just trying to keep me safe, but I’m clear: I’m safe, we’re doing this thing, now get on board.

As for the thought that stops me? I haven’t caught the actual thought (It’s so fast, it feels like a reflex), but my guess would be:
” this isn’t safe, if we (protective parts of brain) let her do this, she’s going to change her life and we don’t know what’s gonna happen so that’s not safe. Let’s keep her in the familiar)

What would you recommend here?