Can’t Stop

I have realized that when circumstances trigger me I often am self coaching myself at the same time as yelling, arguing etc. but I feel like I can’t stop the arguing. I realized this happens when my husband or family disagrees with me on a trigger topic.

For example, last night my husband and I got into a fight. Half way through my brain was telling me this is all you. Why are you interpreting what husband is saying this way? Why don’t you stop and be curious? But I didn’t stop until it had been like 20 minutes of this conversation with my brain. I felt out of control.

C- Husband said words about maternity leave
T- I married someone against women’s rights. (What am I making it mean? Maybe that my beliefs and values don’t matter?)
F- Anger
A- Yell, argue, hit, out of control
R- I am not showing up as my best self

C- Husband said words about maternity leave
T- I am out of control
F- Ashamed
A- Cry, beat myself up, hide, try to burry it
R- Continue to be out of control