Can’t talk to my husband about money.

Every time my husband and I discuss money he gets really negative about it. It doesn’t matter if it’s money coming in or going out, the whole subject is just a huge downer. Today I told him some stimulus money arrived in the account. His response was a diatribe about how he once wrote a huge check to the IRS for a lot of money and now they gave him back crumbs and he doesn’t want to hear about it.

If I tell him a client paid me $100 he says well, I guess that’s something, not a lot, not going to fix our problems, but it’s something. I told him our RE agent said the value of our home had almost doubled in the current market and his response was it wasn’t worth anything because of inflation. And if it’s about money going out it’s like doomsday and how we’re going to run out of cash at this rate and there won’t be anymore. Ever.

I got upset today and told him I’m not discussing money with him anymore. It’s not just money he does this with but it’s one of the main things. I wish I had a partner I could talk to about anything without him going on a rant about the government, other people not doing what they should and how we’re doomed to a life of (eventual, inevitable) poverty.

I’m sick of talking to him period but I’m thinking of just never bringing up money again unless it’s absolutely necessary and no longer including him in any financial decisions I make with my own account. Some people call this financial infidelity but I’m considering it self-preservation. I have zero desire to listen to him rant.

There is absolutely no making him happy about our financial situation. I’d like to enjoy what I have and be happy that our assets are appreciating and I have a client, even if it’s just one here and there. It’s hard to do when someone chronically downplays, belittles, and turns money into the most depressing thing ever.