About a month ago, I broke up with my boyfriend and at the last minute decided to let him keep my cat I had had for about a year, and take his new kitten he had gotten in August.
I love my kitten, but I really miss my other cat too.
I find it difficult to enjoy going out to run errands or go to the gym or go out to dinner or anything like that because I am constantly worried about my new kitten. It’s as if I’m never spending enough time with him or giving him enough attention because I’m worried he’s going to be taken away from me at any moment. I think this is because I felt like I should’ve spent more time and given more love to my other cat while I still had her.
I think there is some guilt thrown in there too. Like, if I leave him alone for more than an hour…I feel extremely guilty for doing so. Sometimes when he’s hiding/sleeping and I can’t find him right away, I freak out. It’s like my higher self knows there’s literally no possible way for him to be gone, but it doesn’t stop me from frantically searching for him in a blind panic until I find him curled up, unbothered, and asleep.