Hi everyone,
I’d like to get some advice on how to go about changing a major belief that has pervaded every part of my life – that I am a flawed, imperfect human being (as is everyone and everything else btw), and that these flaws/imperfections need to be fixed, hidden, spackled over, and/or avoided at all costs. Even my job is centered around finding and fixing errors, problem solving, criticism, etc. I can see how this belief has produced constant underlying feelings of inadequacy, dissatisfaction, shame, etc. and been the cause of so much striving, grasping, struggling and suffering in my life. It’s not lost on me that I joined SCSs to try to improve myself and fix my flaws. And it’s also not lost on me that I now see my thought error that needs to be fixed. I accept that I have chosen to believe the thought that I am a series of flaws that need to be corrected, and that I can chose whatever I want to think and believe – perhaps something along the lines of “I am exactly who I am meant to be, I don’t need to change or fix myself (???)”. But how do I reconcile this with wanting to change and to fix thought errors/patterns in my life and doing the work here. And more importantly, this means I literally want to change everything about who I believe I am and how I live my life – which of course proves I am flawed and need to fix myself. Any advice on how to get started on this would be immensely appreciated.