Okay, I just wrote about this, but I have more. I’m reading over the ground rules for co-parent counseling, and it says you have to treat each other with respect and curtesy and cannot use sarcastic, demeaning, or belligerent behavior. My concern is that my husband is a passive-aggressive person who doesn’t mind lying at all. He has an easy time coming off great initially because he doesn’t have to base any of what he is saying on reality, he is just in an acting production. I tend to be authentic, good and bad. I’m going to get completely reamed if I use non-violent communication, disarm him, self-disclose, be genuine. He will try continue to try to harm me while speaking to me in a “courteous” way.
C: reading ground rules for co-parenting
T: it doesn’t say anything about being a decent person, honest, genuine, about not trying to harm the other person, it doesn’t say anything about not lying, not manipulating. This is going to be perfect for husband who can try to harm me in behavior and then say the complete opposite to me or in front of this co-parent counselor.
A: try to figure out why I am having such a hard time with this. Try to justify myself. Feel justified and unjustified. Feel as if husband will just get more support for his hidden passive-aggressive behavior. Feel defeated, fear. Mind tries to scramble to justify self, but feels as if it will not be able to communicate effectively and will lose.
R: ? I make it perfect for husband and not good for me????
It seems to me this parenting agreement pre-supposes two honest people. Since I think my husband has been diagnosed with narcissism and maybe he has more, I don’t know if this is safe for me/my children.